Help Your Parents Retain Control
Respect your parents’ need to make their own decisions and remain in control of their lives. Limits are often
placed on their autonomy due to sickness, lack of financial resources and the quality of family relationships.
Let them participate in the decision-making process, if possible.
The Family Plan
Reassure your parents. Let them know you are supporting them and they can depend on you to help
solve problems.
Take Stock
As health and living problems arise, assess your parents’ problems and needs. A professional geriatric
team, including physicians, nurses and social workers, can perform the assessment. A lawyer and
financial adviser may also be helpful.
Educate Yourself
You and your parents (if able), need to become educated in areas relevant to their changing situation.
• Legal matters, including wills and property ownership.
• Financial arrangements.
• Healthcare resources and support services.
• Housing and recreation sources.
• Current knowledge of the aging process.
• Consider a free in-home consultation
with a Visiting Angels caregiver to
aid in the decision making process.
Share the Work
Don’t try to do everything yourself.
Share the emotional and physical
responsibilities among family, friends,
professionals and private pay assistance.
Think Creatively
Brainstorm with family and friends about
ways to help older family members
maintain identity, continue interests on
some level and create as many decision-
making opportunities as possible.
Make Small Changes
Opt for the smallest change possible at
each step. Don’t be overwhelmed by the
complete care that may be necessary in
five years, when partial help may be all
that is currently needed.
Take Some Risks
Be willing to take some risks if your
parent is capable of realistically
recognizing them and chooses to take
them. At the very least, be open to a
compromised solution.
Seek Advice
Obtain professional counseling if the
situation or relationship with an elderly
parent becomes overwhelming.
Contact Visiting Angels 24/7 for
assistance at
800.365.4189