Talking About Senior Home Care with Your Parent
When you realize Mom or Dad might need a little help taking care of themselves, it can be a hard subject to discuss – we can help
Hiring a caregiver is a big change for the whole family, but especially for your parent. You and your siblings may notice that Mom or Dad could use some help with bathing, getting dressed, preparing meals, or getting to appointments. Perhaps Dad is spending most of his time helping Mom and as a result, his health is suffering. Your parents may not view the situation the same way you do. When you aren’t on the same page, discussing senior home care services can cause conflict.
You only want what is best for your parents and identifying the need for professional caregiving assistance is a responsible decision. However, your parents may not accept your suggestions. With that in mind, here are four strategies to help your parent understand that home care is a good choice for their well-being.
Be compassionate and caring
All these years, your parent has been there for you in every situation. And, all of the sudden, your parent becomes reliant on you. That’s a difficult situation to deal with. However, it’s much more difficult for your parent. Your parent doesn’t have complete control over their life anymore. Your mom or dad may think that a caregiver presents a threat to their independence.
Before starting the conversation about senior home care, choose your words carefully and with love. Show your parent that you will be by their side along the way. It is important to explain why you think professional care assistance is needed. Expressing your feelings from a place of compassion, care and concern can help your parent understand that you only have their best interests in mind.
Choose the right place and time
The conversation about hiring a senior home care provider requires your complete dedication. You definitely want to talk with your parent in person. Take a few days off and go home. Choose the time and day that is suitable for both of you.
Make sure to have the conversation somewhere where your parent feels safe and comfortable. This may be at their home or yours, perhaps while you take a walk around the block or sit on the patio. Avoid starting the conversation about home care in a public place or during a family event. You don’t want your loved one to feel overwhelmed or embarrassed by the discussion.
Show that you care
We know why you want to hire a caregiver – to provide your parent with the best senior home care possible. But, your parent probably doesn’t think that way - which is logical.
So, give your parent the chance to express their feelings and opinions on this subject. Don’t interrupt them and stay fully focused on what they’re saying.
Once they’re finished stating their opinion, address their concerns and tell them why you think hiring a caregiver is a good choice for them. Chances are your parent will have legitimate concerns about what type of services a caregiver provides, how compatible they will be with their caregiver, and how much home care costs. Since you have done your research, you can provide them with the answers and reassurance they need.
Listen to your parent’s observations
When starting with senior home care, let your parent lead. After all, your parent will be the recipient of home care, so you have to ask them for everything, including the development of a care plan.
Your parent should feel comfortable, happy, and safe with the professional caregiver, and develop a good relationship with him/her overtime. That said, check in often and see how your parent is dealing with the change.
If your mom or dad could use some living assistance in their home, starting the conversation about services can be a challenge. The most important thing to remember is that you have the tools and resources available to help care for your parents in whatever capacity you decide as a family – whether that is part-time care, daily assistance, or 24-hour care.
Visiting Angels of Boulder County is a leading provider of non-medical in home care services for seniors. To learn more about the in-home assisted living services provided by our staff of compassionate caregivers, please call our Longmont office at (303) 828-2664 or contact us for more information.
Visiting Angels proudly serves Allenspark, Boulder, Eldorado Springs, Erie, Hygiene, Lafayette, Longmont, Louisville, Lyons, Nederland, Niwot, Pinecliff, Ward, and the surrounding areas of Boulder County, CO.