Signs that An Elderly Loved-one Needs Home Care Services
With the holidays ending, we’ve all had a chance to spend time with loved-ones and catch up with family. Now, as we return to life as usual, we start to consider more pressing questions and tasks, some of which might concern the family directly.
Visiting with parents, grandparents and other elderly family members over the holidays can sometimes leave us at a crossroads. For instance, mom or dad might not be in the same health condition as the last visit, whether in a physical or mental capacity. Considering whether a loved-one needs homecare can be mentally taxing and emotionally draining and should take a wide range of factors into account.
While some of the following warning signs might be common sense, considering and weighing each one accordingly is an important step towards making a potentially difficult decision.
- Whenever a loved-one poses a threat to his or her own well-being, seek immediate care options.
- A recent hospital discharge can make it difficult for a loved-one to undertake his or her usual daily routine.
- Physical limitations in general can hinder daily activities.
- Loved-ones of any age might be in need of home care if they are undergoing rehabilitation.
- Memory lapses can impede daily functions and can even put loved-ones in danger.
- If loved-ones are having trouble preparing their own meals, homecare should be considered.
- Loved-ones that cannot maintain their personal lifestyles independently might need assistance.
- If a loved-one cannot make it through the night unattended, caregiver assistance is necessary.
- Loved-ones that overburden your personal schedule are most likely in need of full-time care.
- When you’ve exhausted your own caregiving efforts, it might be time to seek a professional caregiver.
Once you’ve taken these warning signs into consideration, the next step can be even more difficult. Approaching a loved-one about the possibility of homecare is a touchy subject, one wrought with emotion that forces loved-ones to confront their own age-related shortcomings. Remember to broach the subject with sensitivity and care. Your loved-ones must feel that their opinions are being considered if their mental capabilities are up to the task.
Discussing Home Care With Your Loved One
Below are a few tips to consider when discussing the option of homecare with your loved-ones:
- Focus on your loved-one during discussions and keep him or her involved.
- Voice your opinions using “I” statements.
- Define a clear topic for each discussion.
- Be assertive but respectful.
- Keep in mind that it may take some time and multiple conversations to come to a consensus.
- Don’t blame others or use “You” statements.
- Don’t try to accomplish too much in one discussion.
Consider setting up a family meeting to discuss your concerns, involving everyone that the decision might affect directly. Keep in mind that the decision ultimately belongs to your loved-one, and he or she should be a central part of every discussion. Family meetings should be supportive, and everyone who takes part must treat the loved-one who needs assistance and his or her opinion with the utmost respect.
When meeting with resistance, don’t push loved-ones into meetings or situations that they are uncomfortable with. Continued resistance requires more assertiveness on your part, but make sure to communicate to your loved-ones that you want to hold the meeting because you care about them and are concerned about their well-being.
Dealing with resistance is touchy. While your concerns might be significant, listen to your loved-one’s concerns as well. If you’re planning a family meeting, meet with the rest of the family beforehand so you can align your thoughts and concerns.
Suggested Methods for Dealing with Resistance
- Demonstrate why you believe your loved-one’s health or safety is at risk, then push the discussion forward.
- Involve others, like clergy, physicians or a geriatric care manager, so loved-ones can have a second, less biased opinion.
- Use community resources like “Meals on Wheels” or a free consultation with a home care agency to help your loved-one ease into the homecare process.
Following the initial discussion with your loved-one, it can help to gently suggest that he or she makes an appointment with a physician (or geriatric psychologist) for a thorough evaluation. A professional evaluation might be the deciding factor for your loved-one. Eventually, most elderly people realize they can’t care for themselves as well as they used to be able to. Seeing a doctor and getting a professional opinion could potentially make the decision easier for your loved-one.
Remember to keep all discussions with your loved-one positive. If they have the mental capacity to make the decision on their own, then they must do so. It is your responsibility to demonstrate your concern first and foremost, not to make decisions for them.
If you have any questions regarding home care services for your elderly loved one, please don't hesitate to contact us!
About Visiting Angels of Newton/Canton:
Visiting Angels Newton/Canton is an award winning local home care agency providing high caliber in-home care services to elderly and disabled adults. Countless families in Newton, Needham, Natick, Wellesley, and the Greater Boston and Metrowest areas have benefited from our cognitive health programs, at home dementia care, Alzheimer’s care, companion care, elderly assistance, respite care, transitional aid, and senior home care services. While non-medical in nature, the care provided by Visiting Angels Newton/Canton can make a big impact on your loved one's happiness and quality of life.