Put More Meaning into Your Visits <br/>How to Make the Most of Your Time with Your Aging Loved One

Caring for an aging loved one can provide great meaning and purpose for the family caregiver. It feels good when you’re able to run an errand for them, surprise them with their favorite ice cream, or fix that leaky faucet that they keep mentioning. The role of the family caregiver is extremely important. After all, you know your aging loved one best and they trust you with the task of caring for them. Yet, the role of the family caregiver can be burdensome as well. Visits eventually turn into to-do lists, leaving little time to actually visit with your loved one. When you do have a few spare moments, the conversation turns towards what else needs done or nagging questions about how your loved one is managing their health conditions. Before you realize it, you leave your visit with your loved one exhausted and drained, having had little meaningful conversation. If you are struggling with how to engage your aging loved one during the short time you have with them, read on for a few suggestions on how to add more meaning to your visits.

Visit First
If your visits have become to-do lists, as mentioned above, rethink how you start your time with your aging loved one. If you typically arrive and dive into housework, laundry, or other chores, try to start the visit with a few minutes of conversation. Make yourself and your loved one a cup of tea or coffee, sit down together, and spend ten minutes catching up. Once you’ve finished your coffee, you can easily transition to the care tasks. By pausing at the start of your visit, your loved one will feel hospitable instead of like a burden to you. Even simply saying “Hello, I’ve missed you,” before you rush to start the endless to-do list can help you and your loved one feel more connected.

Create Photo Albums Together
Does your loved one have a lot of old, family photos tucked away in shoebox? Before they forget all the details of the photos, spend time with your loved one by making family albums. You don’t need to be a crafty person to put photos into a photo album. Simply buy a photo album that will hold individual photos and slip the photos into the slots. As you work together, ask your loved one about the memories captured in the photos. Take a few minutes to record details, such as dates, names, and places, so that your family can keep records of the events. Again, you don’t need to over complicate it, write beneath the photo in the album or buy an album with blank spaces to record details. You may learn something new about your loved one, or at the very least, have fun reminiscing with them.

Enlist Their Help
Keep your loved one’s dignity and independence in tact by assisting them, rather than doing it all for them. Find ways to include your loved one as you work through the to-do list. Perhaps they can help dry dishes, sort their mail, or fold laundry, while you do light housekeeping. Resist the temptation to do everything yourself, as there are often many missed opportunities for meaningful interaction when you take over. You’re also setting the tone that they can’t do it, and it may hinder the relationship later down the line.

Add a Little Spontaneity
When you begin to feel more like hired help than a daughter, son, niece, nephew, or close friend, it’s time to change up your visit. Surprise your loved one with a trip to their favorite bakery or coffee shop. Play a game and clean the house the next time you visit. Celebrate National Donut Day or National Waffle Day or make up your own special day. Go for a walk, sit outside, or take your loved one on a drive. Anything that changes up the normal routine will be life-breathing for both you and your loved one. Do the tasks that you only absolutely necessarily need to do for just this visit and use the remaining time to have fun.

If you are a family caregiver and are feeling drained and exhausted, know that you are not alone. Caregiver burnout is real and can affect your physical, emotional, and psychological health. Fortunately, Visiting Angels Richmond is here to help ease your burden. Our compassionate caregivers are ready and able to take over some of the care demands, leaving you with more time to have a meaningful visit with your aging loved one. Many of our clients choose to receive help with light housekeeping, laundry, dressing and bathing, and homemaking tasks. Our in-home care is beneficial to both the client and their family. If you are ready to have more time to spend with your loved one, instead of spending your time around your loved one, look no further than Visiting Angels Richmond. Give us a call today so that we can learn more about your situation.