TALKING TO YOUR LOVED ONES-Open Discussions Regarding Home Care

Persuading Your Elderly Parent To Choose Home Care

How do you help your elderly loved one get past their family customs or fear of a stranger coming into their home to care for them? How do you tell your loved one that you and your siblings are concerned about them living alone at home? How do you help them keep their independence without interfering in their life or making decisions for them?

These are issues that will not go away with time. To the contrary, it will behoove everyone involved to be proactive about such difficult topics. With advance planning and straight forward discussion, the problem solving process actually can work well, but it will take a concentrated effort by you, your siblings, and loved ones.

Many of the conversations you will be having on your loved one's behalf could very well be emotionally laden, and must be handled carefully. Things to remember when you and your family discuss the possible need for In-home care are:

• Your loved one must be the focus of all discussions and be totally involved. (Assuming their mental capabilities are up to the task).
• Voice your opinions using I statements.
• Have a clear topic for every discussion.
• Be assertive about your thoughts.
• Be respectful of your loved one's opinions.
• Realize it may take some time and several conversations to come to a consensus.
• Avoid blaming others or using "You statements".
• Don't try to accomplish too much in one conversation.
• Anticipate the difficulty in persuading your loved one and reassure them of the freedoms home care will provide them.

Discuss the options of a free, In-home consultation with a Visiting Angels care provider to aid in the decision making process.

Have A Plan

Some suggested methods to deal with resistance are:

• If your loved one's health and/or safety are at risk, say so, and push the discussion forward.
• Involve others, such as a physician, or a geriatric care manager.
• Use community resources, like Meals on Wheels or free consultations with a home care agency, to help everyone ease into the "care at home" process.
• Focus on your loved one's issues, not just the concerns of others. They will be much more accepting if you both share similar wishes and concerns.
  

Strength In Numbers

It's wise to have the family discuss care prior to having the loved one attend a family meeting on the subject. This gives the family an opportunity to get on the same page, which will help to show your loved one that all of you are concerned about similar issues.

Stay Positive

Treat them as an equal-don't parent. Remember, your job is to help them make those decisions, not to make decisions for them.

Give Visiting Angels A Call!!!

Give us a call if you have any questions or concerns about bringing a caregiver into your home. We are here for you in every way!!!