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Helping an Aging Parent Who Can’t Take Care of Themselves

  • Last Updated September 13, 2024

Did your aging mother always wear makeup but now rarely brushes her hair? Or is your dad, who always maintained a clean kitchen, refusing to pick up after himself?

Sadly, it’s not uncommon for aging parents to “let themselves go” by neglecting grooming and hygiene habits. In some cases, decreased hygiene can pose health risks, such as infections from soiled household items or injuries from tripping over collected clutter.

Seniors rarely make a deliberate decision to stop taking care of themselves. Instead, this often stems from a gradual decline in their ability to perform self-care tasks, coupled with challenges in expressing their changing needs. Sometimes, self-neglect is the result of loneliness and isolation, or an attempt to not burden family and friends with their needs.

Signs That Seniors May Be Struggling with Self-Care

As your parent grows older, it can be easy to overlook subtle signs that they are struggling with everyday tasks and self-care. However, recognizing these changes is essential for maintaining their well-being and quality of life.

Here are some key indicators:

  • Lack of personal hygiene
  • Not taking medication as prescribed
  • Poor nutrition or dehydration
  • Unclean living conditions
  • Unpaid bills

If your senior parent needs extra support in maintaining their comfort, Visiting Angels is here to help. We offer non-medical physical and emotional in-home-care assistance, empowering seniors to enjoy a healthier, happier life in their own home.

Related reading: 8 Signs Your Aging Parents Are Unable to Care For Each Other

How Can I Talk With My Parent About Hygiene?

Starting a conversation with your aging parent about their personal hygiene can feel uncomfortable, but it’s an important step in ensuring their health and wellness. Try the following tips in your conversations:

Use “I” statements: When you notice signs of decreased self-care, approach the conversation from your perspective. Don’t make assumptions about what they are feeling. Use “I” statements, such as:

  • I feel worried about you.
  • It hurts me when I see you’re not taking care of yourself.
  • I want to help you because I love you—where should I start?

Knowing you are aware may be enough to remind your parent to prioritize self-care. They may be willing to accept help if it also benefits you.

Encourage social activities: Giving Mom or Dad a reason to dress up and refresh their appearance can make a significant difference. Take them out for a nice dinner or suggest they get involved with a social club or volunteer organization. Remind them they still have much to offer to your family and the community, and that aging doesn’t mean they need to withdraw or isolate themselves.

Companion care can make a difference for seniors who feel lonely. Whether provided by a professional or a family member, a companion can help seniors remember their purpose and value.

Related reading: When’s the Right Time to Hire Personal Care Services?

Visiting Angels Can Help

Seniors are often worried about becoming a burden on their family. With help from Visiting Angels, seniors don’t have to feel like a problem—and you won’t have to shoulder all the caregiving duties on your own.

We’ll work with you to design a personalized care plan tailored to your loved one’s needs, routines, and schedule, with part-time and respite care or full-time services. We can schedule services daily, on the weekends, overnight, and even 24/7 care. Together, we can help your senior feel engaged in their own care and support them in aging well at home.

Contact us today to learn how we can help.


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